Tales of the Other Brother

I say, "When?"

I'm getting a little tired of all these YouTube videos popping up from celebrities (most of whom are not gay) and other random people talking about how "it get's better." I know it all for The Trevor Project, in response to all the teen suicides in the past couple months, but honestly? It's crap.

High school sucked. While it could have been worse, it was no cake walk. No I wasn't teased or bullied mercilessly, but it still happened. I was just lucky enough to have such a wallflower nature that I pretty much slid under the radar. But for the first three years of high school I hated myself. I hated myself for who and what I was. There was nothing I wanted more than to be anything but me. To be "normal". I felt alone. I felt scared. I was unhappy. Finally I came out thinking it would help, not holding it inside me or burying it down inside myself. And it didn't. Senior year still sucked, I was still lonely, still unhappy. Certain people would try and start shit with me, but I ignored it. It still hurt. Several times I wanted to kill myself. But I didn't. It wouldn't have been fair to my family.

Now it's been two years since I was in high school. And guess what? It has not gotten better. I'm still lonely. Still scared(ish). Still unhappy. Those video, while trying to help and sound uplifting, are nothing more than bs. Those people either haven't been in school for many years, or are now famous celebrities who don't really need to worry about what people think. Because who cares? At the end of the day they are still famous, and still have money.

So my question is this: How long must one wait until "It get's better"? Because frankly I don't want to have to wait until I'm forty-something like half those people in the videos. It's been two years since I left high school. Two years. And I am still as unhappy, lonely, and miserable as I was then.

So come on, tell me, when?

So it is totally, one hundred percent, official. We are moving out on Saturday. We are legal tenants of South Park Greens Apartments. 

Oy with the poodles already!
Am I tired. And am I tired of my job. I don't really like to rant or complain about work, but it's really getting to me. It's to the point that am I not only not excited to go to work, but almost dreading it. I'm just tired of the lack of professionality. I get it's only McDonald's, but it's still work and people need to grow up. I can't stand working with a lot of my managers, which is a shame cause they are good people. I just hope that this is really just me and a slump I'll get out of. We'll see.

On a better note, I'm spending the next four or five days pet sitting in Tacoma for Sister. I love her little puppies, but I miss my little girl. I took her and her friend to the airport this afternoon and then went back to her place and watched some Destination Truth. Once I got hungry I went to McDonald's to grab a free Angus burger, courtesy of the Monopoly promotion. It was lame though cause they wouldn't take more than one at a time, so no free fries :(. My McDonald's seems to be the only one that accepts multiple coupons at once. Which is lame cause I can't redeem them there. After I stopped at Safeway and grabbed some cereal and milk as well as some yum yums.

At about ten I got a text from Little Sister, my oldest and one of my closest friends. I love her like a sister and would do anything for her. We met up at Shari's and had a bunch of coffee and shared a piece of lemon cream pie. Sooo good! We sat and talked four almost two hours and just had an awesome time. I miss seeing her all the time and can't wait to have her over to my new place. Which I move into in about 8 days, by the way. So excited, yet so scared. Bills! Rent! Eek!

Now I am in Sister's apartment, curled up on her couch, in her snuggie, watching tv. The doggies have been walked and I am ready to get comfy. Unless something else decides to happen :P

Work tomorrow, hopefully it'll be better than yesterday.

Night!

I was so tired when I got home last night that I could not even comprehend to write about yesterday. I got home at 11 and crashed. People who know me know I'm usually up until 1 am at least.

So at about 11 am The Roomie texted me saying she was on her way over to  pick me up for an adventure and to pack a flashlight and snacks. She picked me up and had her dogs who we had to take out before we could leave. So after dropping off her dogs at her house we hit the road.

Our first stop was Port Townsend, where we went to Fort Worden. It was really cool, we got to explore some old military bunkers and stuff. Then we got in the car and started driving around random roads until I was able to navigate us back to the 101, at which point I told her left to go home, right to go to Port Angeles. She turned right, and our adventure continued it's way up the peninsula.

Pretty much within second of getting in to Port Angeles The Roomie saw the signs for Hurricane Ridge in the Olympics and started following them. It was a gorgeous day and the drive into the park was amazing. The drive up probably took at least half an hour due to the steep gradient and her car's lack of power. We spent a quarter of a tank of gas to go roughly 17 miles. When we got up to the visitor's center the view was amazing. It was so clear you could see everything. Plus this was one of the very, very few times I've been up there without there being snow, so that was cool to see. We went inside too look at the really cool raised map of the park and started mapping out new adventures. After that we went down to the snack bar thingy and had some amazing chicken strips.

After awhile we got bored and started our decent down. It took 15 minutes and we were in neutral the whole time. It was awesome. Once we got down we stopped by my dad and step-mom's to say hi and use their bathroom. I hate using public restrooms. We stayed and chatted a little and realized it was after six and we had a two hour drive ahead of us, so we said goodbye and left with a Tupperware of really yummy homemade salsa.

On hour way home we stopped in Bremerton to see The Roomie's boyfriend and give him the shot glasses she bought him from our various stops. We relaxed there four about an hour, which was a much needed break from the car. After we continued home and I promptly changed into comfy clothes and fell asleep.

Today has been a long day.

I woke up at ten, and had to go to my storage unit to fish out my spring form pan so I could make my sister's birthday cake. She turned 28 today :)
After that I went to two grocery stores to buy all the ingredients necesary.
By the time I got home it was way later than I had hoped for so I went into super bake mode and cranked out what turned into a mighty succesful cake.

I woke up alone cause mom and sister were having mother/daughter shopping/bonding day, so I was able to work in peace which was very nice. By the time they got home everything was pretty much done except for the last minute decorations.

After they got home we met my grandmother at the theatre and saw The Social Network. That movie based on facebook's founding. It was not as good as I was hoping, and kinda gave me a headache, but was still enjoyable. Afterwards we went to dinner at Tokyo Teryaki, which was so yum.

We got home and I put the final touches on the cake and due to limited space Sister turned eleven today :P
After she blew out her candles she opened gifts from me and grandma, mine being the first Harry Potter in hardback (she has the last two and has been going on about how someone needs to buy her the rest :P) and a windchime from our grandma. My mom took her shopping for her birthday.

After that me and mom drove Katie home, since she didn't have her car. After a wonderful ride consisting of singing ABBA in our sick voices, Sister got dropped off and I made it back home. I called the roomie, who had been baby sitting her neighbors. The two cutest boys of all time, the older of which had been bugging her to see me all day. He even left me a voicemail, so cute. So I showed up with a slice of cheesecake to keep her company. When I got there Brody had been sleeping downstairs waiting for me to get there, so we took him upstairs to put him to bed with a story.

We then spent the next five hours doing absolutely nothing and having a blast doing it. I am now in bed and extremely tired. So bed is iminent.

But first pictures of the awesome cake:

So I forgot to mention that yesterday when I saw Keri that she showed us these awesome rad youtube videos. They are called Llamas With Hats. They are hysterical, very dark humor. Enjoy :)








See? Don't you feel better having watched that?
I know I do =]

Today has been a busy, busy day.

It started with me waking up at nine in the morning for the second time in a row. That's two hours before my alarm clock, folks. Not ok. So I saw I had a text from a friend I don't get to see often asking if I wanted to hang out. So I responded and met up by ten. She bought me breakfast, and then lunch later. :)

While we were hanging out we decided to go see our old teachers at the high school. We arrived at lunch which made it super easy to sneak in undetected. The whole time we were walking I was looking at all the young students and kept thinking I was too tall to be there. To which my friend Bree responded, "You were always too tall to be here." Our first stop was my Sophomore English, and our Fantasy/Science Fiction teacher Keri. She is probably my favorite teacher I have ever had. She is just crazy. I love it. Then we went to go bother Freeman who seriously looks like he is twelve. He also happens to be a year older than Brother, which made having him as a teacher senior year kinda weird. While we bothered him someone decided it would be funny to pull the fire alarm. So Bree and I thought it would be a good time to try and work our way to the front of the building and leave, but no we got caught and told to go outside. I guess we really blended in. So because we didn't no what else to do we followed everyone back outside and just hung around until they realized it wasn't a real drill. Before we left we also got to see our old art teacher which was also really nice.

I had to work after that, a whole four hours. It sucked. It was slow. Then super busy. I just wish I had a job I could get excited about going to everyday. We'll see what happens.

Anyway, after I got off work I met the future roomie at my house and went into Tacoma to go to the mall. I just got paid and really wanted to get new body jewelry.
This is what I got: